Get over yourself.

This is sort of the first part of a two-part post I'm planning on writing.  It was originally going to be one post with a disclaimer.  But I realized I'd end up ranting for a couple paragraphs because this is a touchy subject with me and I figured why not just make the original rant shorter for the loss of the page-long disclaimer?

So this is the prologue to the oncoming blogpost, which I'm roughly entitling Doctor Who And Why I Call Myself a Whooligan and Not A Whovian Because My Favorite Season Was Season One and Whovians Hate Me For That.

I'm still working on the title.

But anyway.  The disclaimer was going to say this: loads of Whovians who watched the original Doctor Who before the rebooted show have told me that Eleven is more like the original Doctors, and that's why they prefer him to Nine or Ten.  And that's totally fine.  Different opinions - I like them.  The trouble comes when, as has happened to me, people get belligerent and say that Eleven is the best New Who Doctor and that the people who don't like him obviously have something wrong with them - and if they don't know the original Doctors, then they're obviously n00bs and their opinion is moot.

As John Green said, this is one of those few things that turns me into a giant squid of anger.

Especially now with all of the reboots, remakes, and revitalizations, elitism like this is everywhere.  The people who've been in fandoms before it was cool have disdain to spare for the oncoming newbies.  (Not all of them; I just want to make that clear.  There are idiots and smart people in every group.)  And sometimes I see someone who's had experience in a fandom or an area of interest, and they just swarm over a confused newbie like a one-man cloud of vampire bats, with this wad of corrections and clarifications and facepalms.

It's not. cool. guys.

Entertainment like this is not a big deal.  It's fun.  That's what entertainment is FOR - it's for FUN.  It's for relaxing and deepening your mind and maybe making friends that you wouldn't have made otherwise.

You do not use entertainment - movies, novels, mythologies, comic books, TV shows, radio programs - to talk down to people because they got something wrong.  Okay?  You don't.

A person should be able to enjoy the Marvel Cinematic Universe without getting lambasted because he's never read all hundred billion comics that came before.  A girl should be able to say she really enjoyed The Kane Chronicles even if she knows nothing about Egyptian mythology.  I should be able to talk about Doctor Who even if my favorite Doctor is Nine, I hate Amy with every fiber of my being, and I occasionally write Dr. Who instead of Doctor.  A guy should be able to say he enjoyed the book and the movie without getting "THEY CHANGED THE BOOK SO MUCH" shouted in his face as if he didn't notice himself.  And a girl should be able to say she enjoys Twilight without getting venom spit at her.

Elitism like is hurtful and damaging and it just makes you look like an idiot.  Not all fans do it - fandom people are generally awesome - and of course the nasty fans don't affect everybody the same way.  Some people can roll it off.  Other people internalize.  And before anyone says that they should get used to it - which they should, I agree - I can also say that they shouldn't have to.

I mean, come on.  Jesus loved noobs!  He didn't go around talking down to Gentiles because they didn't have the entire Jewish history in their bloodlines.  I think it was the people who thought they knew everything who ended up getting most of His righteous indignation, wasn't it?

So what this all boils down to, in the end, is respect.  Respect that other people have different opinions. Respect that some people just like Greek stories and that they don't know Ancient Greek and that it sure as heck isn't hurting you if they don't know that Hercules is Roman and not Greek.  Respect that someone doesn't have time to read all the original Avengers comic books and that even if they had the time they might not have the money and that where on earth do you get comic books anymore anyway?    Respect that maybe Owl City's latest album is actually their first introduction to electronica and that just because all they know yet is "Good Time" doesn't mean they don't have all the necessary enthusiasm, love, and effort to put into a fandom.

Or that someone doesn't want to be as big a fan as you are!  What an idea, that someone doesn't want to be just as hardcore and awesome as you are.  Kick in the pants, that.

Let. people. alone.  Newbies don't need a teacher.  They need someone who'll sit and scream with them at Weeping Angels and who'll headbang along with them to OneRepublic's new song and someone who'll await the next book or episode with just as much agony as they have.

In other words, get over yourself.

The return of normal Aster.

Yep.  Catharsis is over.  I'm back to my unsocial, sarcastic, selfish, uncaring self!

To prove it, here's my report on this week's movies.  They actually only measure up to... two.  So I got distracted.  The first, which I watched Tuesday, was Percy Jackson: The Lightning Thief.

Ye gods, Eragon was better than that.

That's all I have to say on that matter.  Except that at least you cared about Brom and Saphira and maybe even Eragon a little bit.  And that the battle scenes were actually interesting.  And that the dialogue wasn't always abysmal.

PJ gets no checks on those.

Today I watched Jane Eyre, the 2011 version with Mia Wasikowska in the title role.  I'd heard great things and I expected to love it, but... didn't.  I don't blame the actors - they were fantastic with what they were giving.  The script was just so... boring.  And it left so many holes in the relationship between Jane and Rochester.  Sigh.  Two disappointing book-inspired movies in one week.  Maybe I'll get better luck tomorrow.

Anyway.  The Book Report:

* Myths of the Norsemen by Roger Lancelyn Green.  YAY NORSE.
* Crazy Beautiful by Lauren Baratz-Logsted.  Modern-day Beauty and the Beast retelling that could be really horrible or really good.
* Cart and Cwidder by Diana Wynne Jones.  JONES AGAIN.
* Beowulf translated by... someone.  I'll get back to you on that.
* Magical x Miracle Vol 2 by Yuzu Mizutani.
* Pandora Hearts Vol 7 by Jun Mochizuki.  I didn't get around to it last week.  I WILL do it this week.
* Wonder by R.J. Palacio. About a kid with a facial deformity.  It was actually really good.

I'm also sort of slowing down with my 100 In 100, but I'm still in the game.  Even if I don't beat everybody else...

This is why I hate book-movies.

The Twilight Saga.  The Hunger Games.  And now Beautiful Creatures.  All books or series that have been or are going to be made into movies.   The hype is unbelievable. (Well, not for Beautiful Creatures.  That's not quite as well-known, for excellent reasons.)

I think everyone knows Hollywood is struggling.  And I personally don't mind lots of books being made into movies, if the people making them have proper respect for their sources. (That doesn't mean I want my book-movies EXACTLY LIKE THE BOOK!! but that's another rant.)  I love books, and there are hundreds of amazing, engaging stories out there.

So why doesn't Hollywood use them instead of picking out the stupidest, most boring chick fluff on the market?

Okay, okay, The Hunger Games is no chick fluff (mostly).  But it's not the best thing since sliced bread.  Katniss is annoying, the violence isn't gory but it's self-indulgent, and aaaaaauuugh, de Wuv Twiangle!  Must every girl have at least two guys hanging on her every selfish word now?

Anyway.

I have a list of books that deserve to be made into movies.  Hollywood, listen up.

1. Ranger's Apprentice series

Action!  Adventure!  Blood!  An awesome old grumpy mentor!  What's not to like about RA?  And, Hollywood, it's got ten books.  Sequel material!

I've actually heard whisperings of an RA movie, but that was ages ago, so it's might have been dropped.  I'd enjoy any recent interviews/snippets about it, though.

(Oh.  And if it does get made into a movie, Hollywood, please get Jeremy Irons to be Halt.  I BEG OF YOU.)



2. Artemis Fowl series

You know the whole villains-as-heroes thing that's going on?  Artemis fits the bill perfectly.  With fairies and technology.  It's James Bond in Wonderland.  Or... something.  Anyway.

Seriously, after ages of this series being insanely popular, it should be a movie already.  I guess finding a convincingly evil twelve-year-old could be difficult.  Asa Butterfield was kinda creepy as Morderd on Merlin, but he's not the Artemis type.  Oh well.

But really.  I'd pay twenty dollars to see this movie.  With some great CGI affects, it could be epic.


3.  The Sisters Grimm series

Fairytales are in, too, Hollywood.

This series is definitely a younger series, but if the movies got a little more grown-up - not a lot, just draw the characters more complexly, cut down the corny humor, make things a bit more terrifying.  Like How To Train Your Dragon, really.  Epic movie that came out of epic-but-sixth-grade-oriented books.  It's possible.



4. Children of the Red King series

Maybe a Charlie Bone movie would be pretty tacky coming straight off the heels of Deathly Hallows: Part 2, but in a year or two, I bet a lot of people would flock to see some more 'magical academy' stories - for instance, people with HP withdrawal.  Like me.

And again, sequels, Hollywood!  And they just keep getting better. (I haven't finished the series yet, but I'm close.)  The characters are interesting, and the 'endowed' idea is just fun.


5. The Bartimaeus Trilogy

Okay.  The best YA series of its kind - what kind that is, I'm not sure; maybe urban fantasy? alternate reality? somethin' - as a movie?  With the snarkiest djinni and the rottenest little magician you've ever met as co-stars?

As Bartimaeus would say: I ask you.  BEST. MOVIE. EVER.

True, I can imagine about a hundred things that might get lost in translation, due to Bartimaeus's amazing inner monologue and those delightful little footnotes.

But, if the movie didn't take itself too seriously, they could find ways to put it in there.  As long as it did take itself seriously sometime.  So, if they found a way to balance the humor with the darkness... Harry Potter, meet you maker.

***

So can you tell what I like to read/watch?   Yeah, lots of those are very similar.  Well, they're sending out a ton of similar teen romance movies and faux-angsty action movies now.  Might as well start a new trend!

Really, the best stories are in the kids' books.  Take my word for it.  You too, Hollywood.  Try looking for stories somewhere besides a Twihard's bookshelf for once.